These Boots Are Made For Walking
By Brian Hall
Sunday 28 Aug 2011 08:59:00
Browse all Brian Hall articles
 

 

 

THESE BOOTS ARE MADE FOR WALKING - AND THAT IS WHAT THEY'RE GONNA DO, ONE OF THESE DAYS THESE BOOTS ARE GONNA WALK ALL OVER YOU........ FRANK AND NANCY SINATRA

 

 

 

Heard a great old song the other day from Old Blue Eyes and his daughter." These boots are made for walking, walking that's  what's they're gonna do,  one of these days these boots are gonna walk all over you." So went the lyrics.

 

 

Made me think of the importance of boots. Obviously, they are useful for football itself, but equally for getting about, being on the move, especially in cold or rainy days. Further thinking led me to look at some who are in need of boots, and some who are not.

 

 

One oddly named bunch seemed to have been told that they generally need no boots. They are called NEET and has nowt to do with our Northumbrian language. It is Whitehall jargon for the now million young people who are not in school, college, or work. NOT IN EDUCATION, EMPLOYMENT, OR TRAINING. No need for footwear for them, unless of course they have to put them on for the obligatory NonJobCentre, or worse, as happened this week, to chase giros around following yet another change to the DWP system/computer which resulted in loads of people without a penny for two days due to the computer probably being down. Not as much as some of them poor buggars, I thought.  Suppose that one of these days some of their boots may be walking all over some government building.        

 

Boots certainly seem on the agenda in France now. Their government has joined the economic cut mob, as they are now in danger of being classified as skint. The worry is that the French might put on their footwear, boots, to protest against big cuts, and the bankers, politicians, and the rich in general. Sound familiar?? Mind you, the French always like a good riot now and then on a weekend.  So the concern over there is that some of those boots may well be walking all over Paris and elsewhere soon.    

 

 

In the world of north east football, a strange story came out from Alan Partridge, allegedly a football manager, but unfortunately working for some very dodgy people. The Chronicle quoted him explaining that he would not have played Joey Barton at Scunthorpe anyway, as Joey had lost his best boots before the SAFC derby, and ended up with blisters wearing another pair. Wor Alan said that he was therefore resting Joey - except Barton was in London talking to QPR, because the club have told him to put marching boots and buggar off. We are still unsure of where Joey's boots will land, except it seems clear that  a cockney man with a rather large belly wants Joey to leave our toon. Obviously, if that so-called businessman with the big stomach is skint, loads of us would help buy him some footwear to exit Newcastle and assist him in spending the rest of his life in London casinos.     And it would be nice of one of our boots marched all over him. Nicely that is, of course.

 

Just down the road, Steve Bruce may well end up with his marching boots. His SAFC board could well be giving him his marching boots, and walking over him soon.  Sad, if another alleged manager gets tread on, really.                       

 

Proper boots will definitely be needed for the autumn Jarrow March to London, mainly composed of young lads and lasses from the region. I will certainly put a bit cash in for them for the dubbin - old word - to help clean their footwear gear. And maybe they might just want to walk over some people who could not give a damn about them.

 

 

Enough heavy stuff on boots. Time for lighter notes on walking. Laughter broke out last night at Scunthorpe, when the NUFC supporters were informed on the tannoy down there that the last train was about to leave that town....               in 2 minutes. The match was well into extra time, so timetable arrangements had gone badly wrong. The Toon fans who had rail tickets seemingly burst out laughing. They were not putting their boots on to walk - the station is not next to the ground, if I remember rightly - and I assume they got home fine, no doubt via Nufc Support Groups Limited in vans, cars, you name it...mind you,.a few stragglers might have stayed to walk to the nearest b and b, then onto a night club.......they might have felt like walking over the announcer on the way.

 

And finally, it is a well known fact that birds - i dont mean the lasses here - dont wear boots. Why should they? They can fly for a start!  But some of the females are getting cheesed off and booting off some of the lads off the aviary pitch, because they find them boring - this is according to the latest scientific research.  These keen, adventurous female zebra finches like more outgoing, interesting, and confident feathered male companions. They prefer personalities, not bonny colours or body size. That is me knackered then with women, if this is the case with them - not that I have bonny clothes or am 6 foot 4. Poor male species without personality - time to walk, or in their case, to fly, I suppose.

 

Maybe, one last finally. Just thought. I need some new boots. Can I drop a hint....it is my birthday on Monday. So if anybody wants to hoy a pair my way, send via Mr Wraith at ToonTalk or PlayersInc.

 

Bry

 

 

 

 

PS quote of the day

 

." MAY THE HAIRS ON HIS ARSE, TURN INTO DRUMSTICKS, AND BATTER HIM TO DEATH" Anonymous of Heaton. But not me.  ....but you can probably guess that it involves a sentiment expressed in a political or football conversation. Football actually, and no surprise, the comment was directed at a certain character owning a football club in Newcastle...obviously, the target of such a comment shall remain anonymous

 

pps one major group wearing  boots  on  ground at the minute need to come home. ASAP. The lads, and some lasses, out in Afghanistan. If they want to keep British forces there before the inevitable happens, and some poor buggar from Gateshead gets shot, why not ask the politicians to send their sons out there. To replace them. Or maybe even better. David Cameron, Tony Blair, and Whoever Leads the Liberals could gan as well.                                 tarah



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