NORTHUMBRIAN MANIFESTO - OFF WITH A BANG ON BONFIRE NIGHT
By Brian Hall
Wednesday 14 Nov 2012 13:53:00
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Some, not that many, like, will well remember the intense media interest, the blogs, facebook crack, and tweets, indicating that at long last Northumbrians were awakening - so to speak - and calling for independence, via a detailed Manifesto. The initial Launch of the Ship duly took place on that historical, or hysterical, Bonfire Night last week at the Old George.

 

The hundreds- ish - of figures who arrived to celebrate the Manifesto's Arrival were, in short, full of passion and fire, full of fuel. Many however did not wish to be photographed personally, for reasons of modesty, or due to other factors actually, in this melee of a new Dawn for the Nation with its Launch For Freedom.

 

 Emotions ran high, as the Document for Independence was piped in by our Northumbrian bagpipes. Tears were aplenty, partly due to the fact that there was nee free beer or scran on.

 

Two leading members of this new movement, who of course had to admit to their names, were Dr - or so he claimed - Armstrong, and Brian Hall, himself a failed Dr in Phd terms. (The latter could not be arsed to finish his Doctorate off, as in true Border Reiver style, he was offered a canny job abroad afore he had to revamp a couple of chapters, and had opted instead for a big payment on the contininent).

 

The self-elected democratic Leaders of a New Northumbria Politbureau read out their domestic policy, to huge acclaim. Jobs would be created. A revamped Hadrians Wall, accompanied by new projects - another canny sized wall at the Tees and at the Tweed. Radical statements were made, to rapturous applause from the barman upstairs in the George, ranging from a determined aim that the English had to pay for our watta reserves if they got in their usual panic over a drought, all the way to an education policy which put Geordie as our main language, and wanted nowt to dae with daft history about Kings and Queens. 

 

The foreign policy was equally well received. It was stated that the restored Nation had had enough of fighting in foreign wars, and wanted canny relations, leaving aside some of our own, of course. That would have been an impossible demand, and the new Movement is nowt without recognising realities in the global world.  No. It was declared that we welcome the Jocks, for example, as long as they dae not try to wreck our nation again. The same strategy applied to the Scandanavians, and it was firmly stressed that we like being in Europe. Good footy away trips, that kind of thing.

 

 

As the hordes grew, ready to revolt - apart from Pete, Shib, Prudhoe Glenn, and Brian from the Felling,  who all went downstairs to the other bar for refuelling and a tab - it became all too obvious that the Northumbrian Manifesto was setting the place aflame. Clearly, this was the beginning of the reborn Nation, visible to all eyes and ears present - weh, a few of them, like.

 

Amidst it all, other leaders of the new self-appointed Politbureau, sorry would-be elected government, contributed their part superbly. Musicians, such as Kiddars Luck, Gary Miller, and poets like Trevor Leonard.

 

 

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OFFICIAL COMMUNIQUE OF MANIFESTO LAUNCH - THE NATION REBORN - ISSUED BY THE GEORDIE POLITBUREAU.

 

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ps. two malicious media stories have to be immediately denied.

 

1.   There is no truth in the rumour that a stray Lincolnshire poet got through the gap, attempted to throw away the Manifesto itself, and was in severe danger of being howked.

 

2. There is equally no truth in the allegations from the Murdoch press that the Shields Ferry was standing by, in a contract with Byker Taxis and a bouncer marra, to take the Manifesto organisers out of the building in case of rejection and revoltion against the cause.

 

 

tarah, but we will be back ..................................soon!

 

 

 

 

 

 

ARTS AND CULTURE       

 

all this........................................................................

 

CONTINUALLY  backed by musicians    KIDDARS LUCK         GARY MILLER                    poets   TREVOR                                    

 

 

 

 

 

 rousing rebel music     

 

 

r......but                       undeterred.....

 

 

 

malicious rumours inevitable                                no truth in one that an infiltrator from Lincoln    was on the verge of being thumped

 

 

 

this is not the beginning                                       it is not even the end of the beginning..............

 

 

 

STATEMEMENT FROM POLITBUREAU ENDS.....................................................................tarah.



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